Dear Abby,

Help! There’s a 24 hour patch coming up what am I supposed to do? My life is all about this game. What do other people do on patch day?


Obsessed Oliver


Dear Obsessed Oliver,

Breathe my frantic friend! Yes it’s true that patch day is upon us and the servers will be down for a full 24 hours, (and get used to it now because the Stormblood patch will probably feel like an eternity) but fear not! I’m going to let you in on five things you can do to make it through patch day with the remainder of your sanity intact.

  1. Get all your (in game) ducks in an order today.

As of the time of writing this, you have about 16 hours to finish everything you need to do in game before the patch. Now you might think you have everything done, but now is the time to double check! Are you side quests done? Your Hildebrand’s and your Scholasticate’s? Have you caught up on your relic or saved up gil in case you need to? What about your beast tribes? Weeping City? Even though we don’t know for sure what you will need to have saved for the new patch, it is okay to prepare for the obvious. This does include any weekly reset things you need to do, such as Scripture caps, your Alexander clears, and so on.

Now if you haven’t done some of the more time consuming things (such as beast tribes) don’t fret! Just do what you can today and think of it as more you’ll have to do once the patch goes live. Do the easy stuff first. The rest you can make up on Tuesday.

As a side note, if you are reading this before a much longer expansion patch, your preparation is extremely similar, except I highly recommend saving as much gil as you possibly can. The last thing you want to worry about going into such a massive change is if you can afford that cute new glamour (or vital piece of gear) that you want. We’ll talk more about expansion preparation in a future Dear Abby, so stay tuned!

  1. Go outside.

I know I know..

But seriously. One of the worst things you can do on patch day is sit around staring at your computer until the game comes back. And yes, you probably do have a lot of other games you can play or Netflix to watch, but patch day is a fantastic time to take a  breather, get some fresh air, so you can sit down when the patch is done refreshed and ready to play.

  1. Get some sleep.

In the same vein as going outside, make sure you take at least a few hour nap. Even if you want to wake up at 2am and jump in at the exact second the patch will allow you to, don’t stay up all day to do so. The last thing you need going into a new dungeon (or primal… or 24-man raid) is to be sleep deprived and grouchy. Patience is key, my friend!

  1. Grab some snacks before you start playing.

This is fairly self explanatory, but if you have somewhere to store some snacks and water nearby do it before you start playing. That way, if you get engrossed in the main scenario (or inevitably stuck in a new dungeon run or primal learning group) you’ll be able to keep yourself full, hydrated, and ready to continue on without getting kicked from a party. This is especially important when tackling the new 24 man content in the first few days. It will (most likely) take at least an hour as everyone learns what’s going on as a team, and going AFK for food is just asking for an antsy person to kick you.

(As a side note, if you are one of those antsy people that kicks someone if they ask to go AFK for some food or water, relax. You’ll get through that dungeon soon, I promise!)

  1. Remember that most people are not able to do everything in a single day.

Now for a smaller patch such as 3.5 (which still has quite a lot to do in retrospect) this may not seem like an important point. But trust me. This is, in my opinion, the most important mindset you need to have going into patch day. Now it’s okay to try and plan everything in advance for what you want to do and when you want to do it, but realize that not everything will fall into a perfect timeline. This is especially true with new dungeons and the new primal. You might get lucky and join a perfect group that can get everything done with no wipes. But you might also get unlucky and get a group that dies seven times in the first two minutes fighting the new primal.

And that’s okay! Remember this is day one content. Even late in the afternoon, not everyone has been able to tackle the content as quit and efficiently as you. Some had to work. Some have children and had to wait for them to go to sleep. Some just didn’t want to play until the evening. So even if you’ve run that new story dungeon six times and know everything like the back of your hand, be patient! Remember how you felt running the new content for the first time. The wonder. The fails. The fun of running things completely blind and not having anyone tell you what you could (or couldn’t do). Do what you can to give that experience to other people for at least a few weeks after the patch drops. I promise you’ll get through it (and you might even get some handy commendations toward achievements, both current and future).

As silly as some of these ideas sound, just remember that getting through the downtime of patch day involves preparing mentally for the first day it goes live. Once the game goes down, take some time for yourself. Work on a hobby you’ve always wanted to do. Take your friend, spouse, or parent out to lunch or coffee. Watch that movie you’ve always wanted to but never found the time.

Take a few steps away, and you’ll find yourself thrilled to come back when the great Yoshi-P gives you the green light to dive right back in.

Good luck on patch day!


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